The Hole in Your Heart
by scalion
Summary: Present Day AU. 19-year old Katniss and her 16-year old sister Prim live alone in their house in Appalachia Hill. Her mother was useless and her father died. Katniss struggles to support herself and her sister, the missing part of her heart growing bigger every day. Until she meets the boy who will save her life, little does she know she's saving his too. My 1st chapter story. R&R!
1. Chapter 1

**Authors Note: Hey there readers! This is my first attempt at a multi-chapter fan fic. AU, no hunger games, a more present day setting I guess. Rated T for language and suggestive scenes! Please take a few minutes to review and tell me what you think. I don't know if I'm completely happy with this chapter, but hopefully my writing will improve as the story continues. Any ideas/comments/critique is much appreciated. Please enjoy :)**

**- Sarah**

Katniss POV

The wind tugged my hair, pulling strands out of the already loose braid as I trudged along the cracked sidewalk. You would think for a town that gives so much to it's Capitol, they would at least provide them with a decent surface to walk on. A stronger gust blew around me, causing my arms to wrap around my bare chest, the low V-neck shirt providing no protection from the elements. A short hiss escaped her lips as the chill hit her skin. Two more miles and she'd be home.

I rounded the last corner, the dilapidated shack coming into view. Flecks of the standard white paint that now barely covered the outer walls littered the porch, showing the building's fast decent to becoming one of the many shit heaps of District Twelve. Where I live is actually called Appalachia Hills. As picturesque as the name sounds, this place was in the lowest income decile of the whole state of Panem, decile 12, hence the nickname 'District Twelve'. I kicked off my leather hunting boots on the threshold, pushing the door open with a huff. I was met with two shirtless bodies, one poised hungrily over the other, a large hand gripping the back of the couch.

"Prim what the fuck!" I cried, nearly throwing my rucksack across the room in surprise.

The brown haired head whips up at the sound of my voice. Silver eyes that mirror my own widen with shock, cheeks flushing red-hot. Rory Hawthorne. Rolling her eyes, I retrieved his discarded shirt that peeked out from under the coffee table. "Get outta here kid, tell Gale he took off with half my arrows," Dangling the shirt on an outstretched finger I place the other hand on my hip, making sure that my disapproval is obvious. He shuffles forward and mutters his apology, snagging his shirt as he begins his hasty journey home.

I turn my body back to my sister. Her face is plastered with a sheepish grin, a tuff of golden hair sticking haphazardly out from her head. "I didn't think you were coming home until four," she admits quietly.

"No excuse Prim, you're sixteen." I growl. I can see her frustration rising. An exasperated sigh leaves her body in confirmation. "You know Katniss," her clipped tone bouncing off the walls, "I'm not a kid anymore. Stop treating me like one." She breezes past me to her room, slamming the door in the process. I swear one day that door will crumble to pieces from the abuse it receives from that girl.

Some time later, after I've cooked up the guinea fowl and small amount of vegetables that I was able to afford at the Hob, the local market, for dinner, I try to coax Prim out of her room. She mutters through the door that she isn't hungry. I decide not to push it. Being four years my sister's senior, I knew not to poke at the unpredictable teenage hormones. She'll come around. I seat myself at the head of our small dining table placing the plate in front of me. My fingers ran over the grain of the worn timber, a pang of sadness and longing hitting my chest. This had come from my old family home. My father and I would sit playing cards for hours while a baby Prim sat in her high chair and gurgling as she watched, a tiny, fat hand reaching desperately for anything in reach. Those were easier times. I shook my head slightly as if to shake the memory from my mind and picked up a leg. The tender meat melted in my mouth, the rest gone in a flash.

Leaving my plate where it lay I stand, heading towards my room. The days hunting had drained my energy more than it usually did, indicating that I wasn't eating enough. As I lifted my shirt over my head my fingers brushed over the ridges of my ribs that were now beginning to protrude from my side. They slowed, examining the rise and fall of the skin, a small frown creeping onto my face. Maybe I could hunt more, sell more game to the Hob dealers, or try and raise her prices. _Get real, Katniss,_ she thought. The Hob dealers were of the no nonsense kind. Any change in the regular arrangements and they would cast her off like yesterdays entrails. She'd find a way though. She always did.

-/-

I woke with a start the next morning, my body shooting upright as a loud thumping chorused through the house. Sunlight streamed through the window. Shit, Prim would already be at school. She goes to Hills High School, the one I used to attend before I was forced to leave. The thumping continued to nag at what I discovered was the front door. I dragged my half dead body to the entrance of the house, whipping the door open with a disgruntled look. I was met with the smiling silver eyes of my best friend, Gale Hawthorne, his hunting sack slung over his shoulder. His expression turned apologetic when he saw my attire, taking in my too big track pants and tank top, and no doubt my birds nest hair as well. "Hey Catnip," he crooned, the way he always does when he uses that nickname, "you might want step back inside before the townspeople come at you with pitchforks and torches." I smack his arm playfully, trying my best to maintain my displeased expression, but fail miserably. "I thought you might want these." He holds my missing arrows from yesterday. I smile and snatch them off him, motioning for him to follow me into the lounge. I set the arrows down and plop down onto the couch. "You brother was giving Prim a tongue bath yesterday," I taunt, throwing a pillow at him "right on this couch here. Never again Hawthorne. Tell Rory to keep it in his pants." A throaty laugh escapes him and he takes the seat next to me. "Oh I'll make sure of it, I'll put him on gutting duty for a week." he jokes. "But Catnip, seriously, what's up? You're wasting away in front of me." his tone turning solemn.

I sigh heavily, "The money's running out Gale. I'm going to have to double my catch each time I go to the woods if I'm going to keep up with the rising prices. I need bread, or something to serve up for dinner tonight. I have to go out again today." The woods are plagued by packs of wild dogs and bears. Gale and I agreed on no more than two trips a week, it was just too dangerous. His face is grave as I meet his eyes. "Katniss you know you can't. I got more than expected from my snares yesterday, I'll give you one of my squirrels. It won't be worth as much since a day old but hopefully it should get you something." I begin to protest but he raises his hand. He full well knows that I don't like charity. "Remember you fed Rory and Posy that time I went out of town for a few days, you're taking the squirrel okay?" He pulls it from his hunting sack, the meat wrapped tidily in cloth. I place my hand gently on his arm, "Thank you." I say softly. He simply smiles in reply.

"I'd better head off, I promised I'd take Posy to the Meadow today, she wants to take her bloody goat for a walk." he says rolling his eyes, moving towards the door. He turns suddenly, surprising me by pulling me into a bear hug. Being the large man that he is, my face became buried in his ribs, squishing my nose and making it hard to breathe. Gale realises and frees me from his tight embrace, laughing his hearty laugh once more. "Take it easy Catnip!" he yells, making his way back down the road to his house. I shut the door and make my way back to my room, setting the wrapped meat down on my small dresser. I pull my unruly hair back into my signature braid, slip on jeans and a plain blue shirt, and hunt around for my leather boots that I'd discarded yesterday. The walk to the bakery in town was a long one, just over ten miles, but it was the only one around. I'm not fussy, but I can't bear to stomach the grainy grey excuse for bread beyond sold at the Hob, and Prim won't even touch it.

The wind from yesterday has gone completely, so the weather isn't actually to bad. It makes the journey to town much more enjoyable. The closer I got the less grungy and run down my surroundings became. The pavement became less fragmented and the paint actually stayed on the houses. She reached the town square around midday. It was bustling with people, a whole group of school kids gathered around the sweet stall at the back of the square. The high school kids where allowed to go into town to buy and eat their lunch if they didn't have a packed one since the school was too poor for a cafeteria and its not like the Capitol was going to help them out. She crossed the cobbled centre to Mellark's Bakery, the scent of warm bread reaching my nose. My stomach churned in response.

I was greeted by the delicate tinkle of a bell as I entered the shop. My eyes raked over the massive selection of delicious baked items that were presented in front of me. I regarded them with hunger and longing. "Welcome to Mellark's Bakery, what can I get for you?" A deep male voice snaps me out of my trance and I raise my head to the source of the question. My breath hitches in my throat as I'm met with stunning crystal blue eyes, the kind of eyes you imagine could see right into your soul. They shined with such clarity that it caught her off guard. "Um…I-I.." she stammered, his lips lifted into a lopsided grin that made her heart flutter. He looks about the same age as me. I quickly averted my eyes, pretending to contemplate my choice of bread. _For fucks sake Katniss, get a hold of yourself, _I thought angrily. Hesitantly I lift my head back up to his face. It still held the smile and he waited patiently for her answer.

My hand drifts to my pocket, fiddling with the small amount of coins I had gained from selling the squirrel at the Hob on the way to town. "Um…cheese buns, please." I choked out. How I managed even that small sentence was beyond me, I was mesmerised by the strength of his jaw. "How many?" his smile still evident in his voice.

"Just one" I could only afford one. Eyeing the coins I had now presented on the counter before him, I spy him slip a second bun into the brown bag. I begin to object but my rumbling stomach tells me to keep my mouth shut. He turns around and reaches down for a bag, his muscles straining against his white '_Mellark's Baked Goods_' t-shirt. My stomach murmurs again, but not in hunger this time. He collects her coins off the bench top, counting them as he places them in the till. I try to gaze casually out the window. "I'm Peeta, by the way. Peeta Mellark." he says, bringing my attention back to him. His hand is outstretched motioning for me to shake his hand. I bring mine up to his, a small smile playing on my lips. "Katniss Everdeen." I reply. His hand is warm and calloused, but soft at the same time. "Sorry I've got to get back to work, but it was nice to meet you Katniss, have a good day." He gives me a parting smile and disappears behind the bread racks. I hurry out of the bakery, the fresh air clearing my thoughts. Something familiar niggles at the back of my brain but I can't pinpoint what. I've seen the boy with the bread before, but where? I ponder for a few more moments then give up, glancing at the clock on the small Court building at the top of the square. It's almost 2.30pm, so I head towards Hills High, hoping to catch Prim before she leaves and walk home with her.

Peeta's POV

Holy shit. _Katniss Everdeen was just in your shop Mellark_. She was more astounding than he remembered. How long has it been? It had been around two years since she randomly stopped showing up for school, this was the first time I'd seen her since. Her beautiful girlish features had morphed into those of a young woman. I glance down to my hand. It's still tingling from when she shook my hand. And electric current shot through my body and I almost melted into her touch. I almost lost myself in her pewter eyes; luckily I caught myself and left before I made myself look like a dick. I bend over and strain to pick up another bag of flour as I recall her smile, my heart pounding in my chest all over again. She had better come back for some more cheese buns.

**Sorry, it's a pretty boring and uneventful chapter, I'm just trying to set the scene. Please let me know what you think! Much love :) xo**


	2. Chapter 2: Social Skills

**Hey everyone! You guys are seriously amazing, 4 reviews, 3 favourites and over 100 views all in the first few hours! I'm really touched, especially since this is my first multi-chapter story :)**

**_Response to reviews:_**

**itsjustdude: ****Oh damn! I had originally written this piece in third-person but didn't like it and went through and changed it. Obviously I missed a bit! I'll keep an eye on that, thanks for your review :)**

**Here's the next chapter! I'll try and update as much as I possibly can for you guys, enjoy!**

**- Sarah**

Peeta's POV

I rose before the sun as I usually do. A baker's schedule is relentless, but I'm used to the 4 a.m. starts. Rubbing the sleep from my eyes I move down the hallway and through the internal access to the bakery. The cold morning air hits my bare torso causing me to shiver slightly. I'll warm up once the ovens are on. I travel around the supply room lazily, bundling the ingredients for cheese buns in my arms. Katniss was on the brain. The materials fall haphazardly across the stainless steel bench and I get to work. I mix together flour, yeast, milk, eggs and cheese, folding the ingredients in a large bowl until it becomes a soft dough. I pile it together and press the heel of my hand firmly into the malleable mixture, pushing forward slightly. I fold the far edge back onto the ball and repeat. It's a mind numbing process and I cherish the relaxation. I'm still shaping and molding the dough when my oldest brother Phox pokes his head around the corner, eyeing me quizzically. It was my morning off after all. He doesn't question me though. "We're going to the cemetery today," he says carefully, "do you want to come?" I simply nod in reply and he leaves me to it. My methodic movements consume me and I am unaware of the sun beginning to creep through the window. I hear the melodic tinkle of the bell and I'm a possum in headlights, I'm still only dressed in my boxers. _Shit, shit, shit._ My hands are covered in sticky dough, not that I can see anything to cover myself up anyway. I don't actually register who walked through the door until I see the grey eyes in front of me.

Katniss POV

His skin is paler compared to mine, a typical trait of those who live in town. The broad lines of his chest lead me down to the ones that indented his hips and lower stomach. The cotton boxers that hung off him precariously teased my eyes, making my stomach squirm. His face held the look of mortification as he grappled for a tea towel to wipe his hands. His hair was the same colour as Prims. The curls slipped delicately over his face, his azure eyes grinning down at her. "I apologise for my state of undress," he says sheepishly, red tinting his cheeks, "does this distract you?" He pulls a ridiculous attempt at a seductive pose that raises a laugh to my lips. Something about him made the pain subside for just a moment, she liked the feeling. It had drawn me to make the long trip to town for the second day in a row. I didn't really know what my intentions were; I was planning to wing it. I guess I should've known this wouldn't work with my hostile attitude and serious lack of social skills. I just can't ignore the magnetism I feel to this man. "I came for some more cheese buns," I offer, "they were delicious. I don't have any money, but I have fresh turkey meat if you're interested?" I don't understand why guilt flashed across his features, but he quickly masks it with a smile. "That sounds perfect, I was meaning to get some fresh game today, and you saved me the trip." Just like yesterday he bagged two cheese buns, still warm due to the early hour of her visit. As he wraps the end of the bag up he looks down, frowning slightly. "Tomorrow's my day off," his voice filled with caution, "this might seem a little forward, but did you want to hang out? I don't know, maybe take a walk to the Meadow, anything?" I stand there like a blinking idiot, trying to comprehend what he said. "Uh…sure?" _Yes! Yes I want to!_

"Great!" he exclaims before I've even finished my rather nonchalant reply, as if to confirm it before I change my mind. "Could you meet me here at midday? I should be finished my chores." What am I doing?! "Sure, I'll see you then." I nearly fall out the front door. _Well Katniss, time to find some social skills._

**I'm sorry guys, this is really crap and I'm not that happy with it at all. I just feel like I need to set the basis of the story. Let me know what you think. The next chapter will explain a lot of stuff, hopefully it should be up by tomorrow. Read and review, much love xo**


	3. Chapter 3: I'm Sorry

**Hey readers :) Sorry it has been a few days since I've updated, you could say its been a rough weekend. Sorry that the story is moving kinda slowly at the moment, it will get more interesting I promise! Or I hope…  
I realised that in the previous chapter I didn't mention the name of Peeta's other brother…his oldest is named Phox, and the middle child Gunnar. Just to clear that up.**

**Thank you to all you lovely people who have taken the time to read my little story :)**

**_Response to Reviews:  
_****marycontrary82: don't worry I will be filling the gaps in the next few chapters!**

**Enjoy the chapter!**

**- Sarah**

Peeta's POV

'_Charles and Lorna Mellark. Loving parents. Taken before their time._'

I see they'd finally got their new headstone. Cold and grey. Much like dad's hand when I had rushed to the hospital only to discover that I was too late. It was my fault, as much as Phox tells me it's not. Gunnar agrees with me though. To say our relationship has become strained would be the understatement of the year. I'd burnt the underside of my arm on the edge of the oven, stumbling backward and sending a freshly baked rack of muffins flying. Mother was furious, muffins were one of the most expensive things for us to make. She gave me an absolute earful, grabbed the rolling pin I was holding and smacked me round the face with it. This of course wasn't the first time, and I was sick of it to be perfectly honest. I stood up to her, telling her what a vile woman she was, how she always put the business before her family and treated them like crap, how my father would have been much better off had married the woman he almost ran away with. She stared at me dumbfounded. I pushed past her and out the door with no remorse. I remember thinking that I wish she could die.

I came home a few hours later to a frantic father, apparently mother had left when I did and still hadn't returned. It was around 10pm and the rain was coming down in sheets. Ignoring my protests he jumped in our beat up Toyota Camry and drove off into the night in search of her. I had no idea how it was still deemed roadworthy and new it wouldn't be long before it all but fell off the road.

And that's exactly what it did.

Flashing lights, tears mixed with rain and white sterile walls is all I remember after that. Mother died instantly, but my father arrived at the hospital awake with serious injuries. His condition deteriorated rapidly and I was two minutes too late. I held his cold dead hand. It was my fault.

Phox nudged my arm, snapping me back to reality. I placed the small bouquet of flowers in my hand at the base of the stone. They were blue mistflowers, not really a flower but more of a weed, but they were mother favourites. Their smiling faces pierced my soul as I stared at the photo I held in my other hand, placing it with the bouquet. A small tear escaped and rolled down my cheek. _I'm sorry…_

The ride back was uneventful. We'd been able to buy another car with the small inheritance we had received. The cemetery was on the outskirts of town so the drive was long and uncomfortable. You could cut the tension in the car with a knife. I could feel the waves of anger coming from Gunnar in the backseat hit me with full force. He had idolised her and in turn became the favourite son. Phox was the most like my father, patient with a kind heart. We pulled up to the bakery, the backdoor slamming before we had stopped fully. Gunnar caught my eyes to give me one artic cold glare then sauntered off into town. Sighing, I felt Phox's hand on my shoulder, patting it lightly. "He'll come around." a weak smile on his face.

.-"*"-..-"*"-..-"*"-..-"*"-.

Her face was in my dreams, 8 years old and full of life and laughter. Her hair was in two braids instead of one, her red dress floating around her as she bounded around the meadow, the spring dandelions beginning to pop up from their roots. She was the most magical creature I had ever seen. I stood at the edge of the field, astonished by her radiance, when the ball she was playing with bounced out of her reach and rolled onto the road. Unfazed she skipped onto the sidewalk and hurried after the wayward ball. Unbeknownst to her a car full of outrageous teenagers screeched round the corner. She was in their way and had no intentions to stop. Horror cursed through my body as the result unfolded in my head. I left my position in a dead sprint, my heart rattling in my chest. I dived towards her, pushing her out of the way with the car only a few feet away. Pain ripped through my right shoulder as the wing mirror clipped my side and sent me careering sideways. I cried in pain but only thought of the beautiful face I had tried to save. I looked up to see her steel coloured eyes wide with fear and tears, a mangled looking hand clutching an equally mangled arm. I had saved her, but hurt her in the process. I felt like a monster. I stumbled as I tried to stand but found my footing as I mumbled a quiet apology. Despite the pain I ran home, never looking back to the confused and tear stained face of the beautiful girl.

**Again it's pretty pathetic and nothing has really happened yet, please let me know what you think. I'm losing confidence in my writing, and if people don't like it I won't bother continuing. Hopefully the next chapter will be up in around 2 days. Thanks for reading :)**


	4. Chapter 4

**Author's Note**

****First of all I want to start off by apologising for keeping you all waiting. It's been over a moth since I last updated, but do have a good reason.

My personal life is quite frankly in complete turmoil and to add to that school has been kicking my ass. Exams are also coming up in the next three weeks. Everything that has been happening to me has blocked my ability to write. I've tried so many times to start this chapter but I realise that as much as I want to write it for you guys, I don't want to write it...if that makes any sense. I've kind of lost my passion for writing and other things I used to enjoy. I'm heartbroken that this has happened and I don't know how to change it. Maybe in time as things start to get better I'll be able to come back to it but for now, this story will be on hold indefinitely.

Thank you all for the support and reviews you've given me in the short life of this story and I hope to hear from you sometime soon if I can bring myself back to writing.

Much love,  
Scalion


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